2015…..Gracious

First of all….it’s been a LONG time for me and this blog. I think it would be better if I actually had a computer, but I dont, so iPhone it is.

The Job- still at Navy Federal. Still love it. Spent the first year as a transactions MSR. Spent the 2nd and most of the 3rd year as a Team Coach. Ended the third year as a supervisor and going well. Still love my job. I will retire from there. It is amazing. Supervisor was my end goal, and it came quick. Might have to expand my horizons since I plan on being there for another 35 years or so. LOL.

Kid- Logan is awesome. He’s been through some trying times. His biological father walked out of his life 2 years ago. It’s sad. However, his stepdad has provided his father figure and he loves him. We are having Logan see a counselor just to make sure he can talk it out. Logan seems to enjoy it. It’s not our first go round with counseling.

Life- Life is weird. I’m serious. You just never know what to expect day to day. The things that happen around you. The things that happen to you. It’s all different. Something can strike and make you happy, sad, upset, depressed, etc.  I always wonder if everyone goes through the same range of emotions that I do. Things that shouldn’t affect me deeply.  I am a caring person. Sometimes I wonder if I’m too caring.

Not a long post, but one that had to be done. Hope to be able to keep up with it now.

Dominic Toretto: [remembering the time he had with Brian] I used to say I live my life a quarter mile at a time and I think that’s why we were brothers – because you did too. No matter where you are, whether it’s a quarter mile away or half way across the world. The most important thing in life will always be the people in this room, right here, right now. Salute mi familia. You’ll always be with me. And you’ll always be my brother.

It’s about that time again:)

So it’s once again been quite a while since I’ve updated. Decided it was about time.

Logan-He is doing well……well that’s not all true. Logan is having some trying times lately. He has some things that he is working through but we will get there. He is doing pretty good in school. Art and PE are his favorite of course. In the past month or so we have had one trip to the ER for a busted chin which he got by doing arm farts in the shower. Wish I was kidding about that.

Me- I’m doing good. I just turned 31. I love love love my job at Navy Federal. I’ve only got another two months and I will have my year review. I’m on track to exceed expectations. That’s what happens when you love your job and have a wonderful supervisor. Home life is good though I miss being close to things some days. Other days I love it. I finally caught up to the 21st century……I got an iPhone. I love it!!!! That’s actually what I’m using to write this:)

Zombies-yes I believe they are still coming. In fact I just saw an article today on WTOP about zombie bees. Not kidding, look it up. So I guess that may be the start. I really hope it doesn’t happen this year though. I would like to not have to go through something like that.

Well that’s all I can think of for now. I hope everything is going good for anyone who reads this. I usually end with a quote but I haven’t figured out how to do that on here, so maybe next time:)

2012 already…Zombies are coming this year!

Here we sit. January 2, 2012. It’s amazing how time flies. I noticed that I have not posted since September I believe, so I figured, what the heck. I’ve got some time to myself (as Logan is at a neighbors birthday party) and David is watching TV. Time for a couple updates and insights/predictions.

Updates first:

Trailer/Apartment-Trailer sold in October. Happily gone from our lives. Apartment is done (except water line). We’ve been living in the apartment since Thanksgiving. Loving it so far. It’s wonderful. It’s warm. It’s ours.

Ankle-Healed, I think. I never did make it back to my last appointment, but there are no bones sticking out, so I guess I’m okay! Dr’s are expensive when you don’t have insurance!

Job- I have found a new home I think. I am now employed (and have been since November) at Navy Federal Credit Union. I have two weeks left of my six weeks of training. Crazy how time is flying by. I’m wondering how confident I will be at the end of those six weeks. Definitely a lot to learn, but I am confident I’m doing ok. Not great, but ok:)

Logan-Doing wonderful. Loves school. Loves reading. Loves life. He is my little boy who just celebrated his 9th birthday on December 28th. Still can’t believe I have a nine year old little boy! Time sure does fly. He fell asleep in the truck on the way home from Winchester today. Just reminds me of how young he still is, but how big he is getting!

Okay-Insights/Predictions.

As you noticed my title did contain “…Zombies are coming this year!” As you all know, or should know, I have a SLIGHT obsession with zombies. With the prediction of the end of the world happening in December, I’m gonna chalk it up to Zombies! Or the end of our world is we are all turning into Zombies. Something like that. Either way, it’s time to prepare. Lance, Cindy, and I have been contemplating our bunker. I live in the perfect place for a bunker, but we really need to get it built:) I know, I’m crazy. But who will be the one laughing when the zombie outbreak happens???

“God has fled. Hell reigns. Darkness prevails.”
    – Priest, Shadow: Dead Riot (2005)

..And still Life goes on…

Well, I just figured I would give an update on my life. Not a very interesting one,but a few things going on.

First-The ankle

I am happy to announce that I have been to the doctor again. It is STILL BROKEN! However, it is healing. I guess it’s not as broken as it was, but it is still broken. I am off of the crutches, but I am in the ASO brace. I’m not complaining, or trying not to at least.

Second- The Job

I have found a job! I got it through a Temp Agency. I will be working 20 minutes away from home. It is only guranteed for 90 days, but it could turn into full time work. After my last experience-I am happy to have the opprotunity to “test” a job and a boss:) It is strictly Data Entry, and UAT (user acceptance testing). I’ve done plenty of both (thanks to Personify!!!!)

Third-Healing myself

Some of you know, some of you don’t. After some trying times (people) at my last job, I decided that an Anti-Anxiety drug might be helpful to me. My hypothesis proved true. I began taking these drugs in January. It helped me through my last couple of months. I really wish I had thought of this earlier. Well, since I am not longer in that stressful situation, I have decided to stop these. I began about 2 1/2 weeks ago. The doctor advised me to slowly wean myself off of these drugs. I followed her advice and found that I basically got the fun experience of going through withdrawel every other day. Definetly not fun. I called the Dr back and asked if I could just quit cold turkey. She said I could try, so I did. Let me tell you. I now understand why these people you see on Intervention have a hard time breaking a habit. I went through HELL coming off of them. I am feeling better today ( besides this COLD that David decided to share with me). I’m no longer sick to my stomach. I can walk without feeling as if I’m going to fall down, and my house is no longer spinning! The pills definetly helped, but because of how hard it is to get off of them, I will never do that to myself again.

Fourth- The apartment

No update yet. Hope to be able to update that soon!

Fifth- Logan

Logan is doing great! He still loves living out here. I got to talk with his main teacher today and his art teacher. The best best best news I got today was from his main teacher. She told me that she is amazed by Logans reading skills. To hear this was the best thing for me. This time last year, he was testing a grade level behind in his reading. To have come this far is beyond amazing to me. I can only thank Hamilton Elementary School and Staff for this wonderful achievement. Without their RI program, he never would have made it.  I am happy to say that Augusta Elementary also has this program, but Logan is no longer in need of it 🙂 Logan is healthy, happy, and as stubborn as ever! He is enjoying his new school, and new lifestyle here. I think he may even have a girlfriend;)

So there you go. That’s my updates. If I forgot anything and you want to know, just ask! Hope all is well with my “readers”. Let me know how your doing!!! I would love to hear from you!!

“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”-Maria Robinson

Verdict #2-Still broken

I was very excited about going to the doctor yesterday. It was like Christmas all over again!!! I couldn’t wait for 9:30 am to arrive. Well, 9:30 am came and went. The doctor’s office was running late.

I sat in the waiting room untill around 10 am. I went back to the examination room. I waited there. A nurse came in and cut off my cast. I have never been so excited to see my leg!!!

CAUTION: The paragraph below is detailed and my be deemed GROSS by some!!!

My leg was as hairy as it had every been. It was also starting to change color. The skin that had grown on the bottom of my foot could have protected me from fire coals!!! David did NOT find it very sexy. He actually pretty much did not want to see my leg. To me, my leg was the prettiest thing in the world, as it did not have this bright pink fiberglass wrap covering it! The nurse took me to get an X-ray done to make sure everything was okay. 

After that was done, I returned to the examination room, and proceeded to wipe my leg down as best I could with a wet paper towel. That water on my leg felt wonderful!!!

The doctor came in and asked how my ankle felt. I said it felt fine. No pain. I was ready to walk!!! She said she was waiting on the x-rays to check. She told me about some strength exercises that I could do. I was happy to do them. She said that they would put me in an ASO brace, but that it would fit in my shoe so I could walk! I was so happy.

THEN THE X-RAYS CAME BACK. My break is still there. At this point, I’m almost in tears. She said that I could not walk on it yet. I told her that I could not have another cast. That I had to be able to drive because I had to find a job! I am tired of being at home!!! She said she could put me in the brace, but I would need to continue to use the sent-from-hell crutches. She did not say they were sent from hell, but I absolutely know that’s where crutches came from. I agreed.

So, I still have no pain, except for the pain coming from my brace being tight. I feel as if I could walk on my foot, but I’m getting yelled at for trying.

Therefore, I am still on crutches, I have a brace to wear every moment of every day (except the shower-in which I still have to sit down). The up side of this story, I CAN DRIVE!!! I have taken the opportunity to drive last night and today! I LOVE MY CAR!!!! I’ve MISSED my car.

I miss walking, but I’m trying to be good. At least it’s not permanent. I am very grateful for that.

You know how if the groundhog sees his shadow it’s 6 more weeks of winter (I think)???? Well, if the doctor still sees a line, it’s 4 more weeks of crutches. Next appointment is the last week of September. Keep me in your thoughts (healing thoughts that is!!)

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but so will hills and crocs. -Me

Logan and other things

I have 1.5 more days until this cast is gone (hopefully). I have tried to stay off of that leg the best I could, but I have to admit that I have cheated a little. I’ve hopped around on this foot just a bit. Being home alone makes me a little more self-dependent then I have been since this has happened. I told Logan and Dustin that as soon as I have a job,  I owe them a prize for helping me so much.

Logan is on his second week of his new school. He LOVES it! He has made some new friends. He loves his classes. They do it a little different here. He actually has to switch teachers for math/english/reading. He likes this. I think it may help him too. He gets a little change in the day. He loves to eat breakfast and lunch at school! He asks every morning what they are having. He likes riding the bus. This is the first school year that he has actually rode the bus to and from school each day. He likes to ride the four-wheeler to the bus stop. This will change once I get my cast off or once it gets cold. We actually have a set routine. This is nice. I know this will change once I get a job.

I will be on the job hunt once this cast comes off. I think I’m going to need thoughts of luck for this one. I have applied for some jobs, and I knew when I left my job that it wouldn’t be very easy to find a new one, but I think things are worse than I thought. I’m okay with that though. This move was definitely worth it!

I miss my friends. I haven’t gotten to visit anyone due to this cast. I really would like to see some of my friends and hang out. Definitely on my list of things to do SOON!!!!

I have my family reunion this weekend. I am looking forward to it!! We have this once a year and I LOVE getting to see everyone. My brother and Mandy have a new baby to show off (Avery), and my family needs to meet Caleb (my brothers soon to be stepson). He calls me Aunt Crystal, so he gets lots of pluses in my book! Tamara also has Skylee to show off! It’s just a wonderful time to be part of my family:)

I guess that’s all for now! I’ll post again on friday to update on the cast. Hope everyone reading this is doing well!

“The love of a family is life’s greatest blessing” -Unknown

Time to be Grateful

I’ve been taking things one day at a time. My leg is healing just fine. In fact, I have 12 days left until my cast will come off (hopefully). I will then be in a walking brace and be able to put these crutches in the closet, in hopes of NEVER having to use them again.

I know I’ve complained a lot about this, but I haven’t taken the time to appreciate anything that I have. Just today, David took Logan for his haircut. He told me that when they passed the Walmart parking lot, there was a suburban with a sheet draped over it. The sheet said “Getting evicted on 8-31-11. Please help”. There was a lady with a baby that was less than a year old sitting behind it. That lays pretty heavy on the heart. Who knows their story. Maybe she was laid off. Maybe her husband left. Maybe she hadn’t worked. Who knows. But to have a baby and no place to go, that’s hard.

I’ve been pretty lucky my whole life. I’ve never been homeless. I have always had a place to go.May parents were gracious enough to let me live at home as long as I wanted to. Logan’s grandmother put up with us for a long time after that, off and on. She was and still is always there for us, both of us, even though TECHNICALLY I’m not her family, she still considers me such.  Davids parents are now putting up with us until we can get our trailer sold and apartment finished. They are feeding us, helping out with the kids, and helping out with me since I am currently not 100% mobile.

I have wonderful people surrounding me everyday and helping so much. My friends, my family, and even my pets. I have a wonderful fiancée who is being very supportive (emotionally and financially). I have two kids who are helping me all day long (and I will miss that once school starts for both of them)!

So, what am I grateful for??? I am grateful for all of this and more. Friends, family, pets, neighbors, thoughts, prayers, a place to live, a school to send Logan and Dustin to, the ability to find a new job when I can. This list could just go on and on.

For anyone reading this, I have one request. Leave me a comment. Tell me the first thing that comes to your mind that you are grateful for. Then, for yourself, grab a piece of paper. Write down at least 10 things that you are grateful for. Put this list somewhere that you can see it every morning when you wake up. Remind yourself that no matter how crappy your day might seem, you ALWAYS have something to be grateful for and appreciate:)

 In daily life we must see that it is not happiness that makes us grateful, but gratefulness that makes us happy.

Brother David Steindl-Rast

Verdict: It’s broken

I’ve always said that I’m a little clumsy. I’m always tripping over air, falling down for nothing, getting little scratches here and there. I’ve never considered myself graceful. Well, Sunday took the cake.

We had just gotten home from Hampshire Hospital. We had gone to get David some Prednisone as his Poison Ivy was getting way out of control. When we got home, we decided to take a walk down to the river that is on our property. David had taken the 4 wheeler down, but I wanted to walk. As I’m walking down the little hill that leads down to the river, I trip. I think I’ve caught myself, but alas, no, I still keep falling. I land on my ankle and it twists inward. Both Shane (our friend) and I hear a popping noise. David helps me onto the 4-wheeler and back up to the house. We get BACK in the car to go BACK to Hampshire Hospital. So two visits to the hospital in less than an hour. Yea!! We get there and they are looking at us like we are crazy since we are back! The nurses there were very nice. The X-ray technician took the x-rays, and gave me a copy.

I was really hoping for just a sprain, but nope. I have a broken fibula. Good news about this?? It is a clean break, which means only a cast. No pins or surgery needed. Thats the bright side!!

So here I am. Cast and all. Cast is pink of course, as thats one of my favorite colors. Logan and Dustin are very excited about getting to draw on it! I’ll take a picture of the final product when its done:)

I am grateful for the help that I am getting right now. Davids sister, Malinda (Co-creator of Change your Conversation) was still on her way home from a trip to SC and he called to ask her to come help on Monday. No questions asked, she showed up and helped out with the boys and waiting on me on Monday. Davids Parents and grandmother, whom live here in the house, are helping out greatly too. I don’t think I could make it through the next six weeks without them. Star will be joining us for a week or so to keep the boys busy and to help out! I’m so happy I have a little sister who can help!!! She loves to be out here and she does not mind helping at all!!

Wish me luck over the next six weeks. These crutches are a PAIN, but I’m learning to use them. Wish it was a bit easier! Needless to say, being overweight doesn’t help the situation at all!!

Thought for this post: Why do they put you on crutches after you break your ankle? Isn’t that just another form of torture when your already in pain???:)

Life-In a box and in the country

I’ve been living out of boxes since June 21. “Honey, where is my…”. “Honey, I don’t know check one of the MANY boxes in the other room”. Logan is REALLY missing his toys that are stored somewhere in that room also. Our apartment is close to being finished, but not there yet. It would REALLY help if this mobile home would sell! Box living is not for everyone, but I think we are doing ok with it. I found most of the needed clothes and shoes. Other than that, I think it can wait.

Life in the country-not so hard. Kinda relaxing actually. I’ve been getting up in the mornings, helping out with the animals, trying to help out more around the house. I couldn’t sleep past 5 this morning, so I got up and started doing stuff on the computer. We get to go swimming, 4-wheeling, bike riding, and all kinds of things whenever we want. We are getting used to it here. We all miss our friends from “home” though. One bad thing about country living-I think I am now part of the food chain. Well, at least that’s what the mosquitos think!!!

Later on today, I think Logan and I will go to the store to get some stuff to make chip dip. My friend from NASSP used to make it, and I LOVED it!

The country life is to be preferred, for there we see the works of God; but in cities little else but the works of men. And the one makes a better subject for contemplation than the other.

-William Penn

Feelings of Anger

Anger. Sadness.Frustration.Confusion. I feel like all of these go into a ball. They are basically all felt at the same time. The worst part about all of these feelings? They are HARD to get rid of…even if it isn’t for a situation that is thought of as your own.

I’m dealing with a situation kinda like that right now. I have been for sometime now. It sucks to say the least. Some people can just be down right selfish, without thinking they are at all. Some people can be down right mean, and think that they are being an angel the whole time. Some people can be nasty and deceitful, but think they are pleasant,upstanding, God-fearing people. I assume at some point it will all come back to bite them in the butt!

My problem with all this?? How to let go of mine own anger towards this situation. It’s much harder than you think. It’s something that I have not accomplished yet.Something that I cannot figure out how to do. Something that keeps me awake at 11:30 at night sometimes, tossing and turning in my bed, knowing that deep down, I’m just NOT this kind of person. The kind to let someone elses stupidity, deceitfulness, down right dirtiness get to them. I’m the happy go-lucky, smiling, forgiving person. The person who can usually take a situation and turn it around. Well, I just can’t seem to this time.

All of these feelings, on top of the feelings of nervousness trying to sell this mobile home, have got me twisted in knots. I keep telling myself that everything will be okay, and deep down I know that it will, but this ball of Anger/Anxiety just POPS up outta nowhere. Just wish me luck on finding a resolution for it all!!

“There are two things a person should never be angry at, what they can help, and what they cannot.” -Plato